Carolina beacon [November 4, 1836]

              FTTBLZSKEB ^SEEl^ gTT »., S^ £ DOLL AJ1S ?DR ANW^S,
>»
VOL. 1.
AH EXTRACT.
Art thou a Christian! Thoagh thy cot
lie IWH, niul poverty thy lut,
Uejoice; the Savior bent lo know
J'hc ills of want, the cares (if tro:
Ami tc ili>' faithful (»»>r lias given
Tin- rich inheritance of heaven.
Art thou n Christian doomed t.i roam.
Fur from thy friends tnj intivc boino .'
Look round on vull.-j-, hill uiul |il lin,
< luT* crow n'd H iih trees and fu Ids with grain:
View nature'! chants, and lm.-y man.
And (ell KM midst Ibe varied plan,
\i li"J hnst limn nutrk'd Of what survcy'd,
That God, thy wither, hu not ><vii'.<-1
Then lo\e his work?, mid love to trace '
Mi* BcmbUnea in n stranger's hire;
Call each moot spot a home to t!ic—.
And every man God's family, j
Art thou a,(li.i.-t;an, mid Hie strife
Of years mature, and busy life!
lie active, for thy race is si orl,
lie cheerful; hoi* ragelsbcar
An nnlidote to nil thy care}
Ami let no pangs disturb a l.reast,
Prepared lor overlwting rest.
—^_^_ i
TDK HEAD AND HEART.
Tlie head and heart often run strangely
counter to-each other- 1 have been asked
the reason why uiai.y men who are full of
pun! COtnmofl sense maxima—Mho can talk
about prudence by the day, ami seem t» be ,
im u of wisdom: act so ilirccth opposite
to their own theories, ami by practieo over-.
turn all their precepts; and I can give ■■ ,
brief annffcr to the question—'J'lmi irw»
html icork—Ihin, heart icork. 1 v.ill OX-1
plain more fully.
On." of the first conclusion! I arri\iil at
on entering the world of business was thi-
—my relation lo sici.-iy its one of ils sn-eial
members is snclif as ihat'ii is nn|ior-t-
ini that I should retain the good opinion,
ami friendship of every member of it, as
far as I am abb—tntltiscnd much forbear-mice,
jrn at evenness of tt in|n r, and pore-
I fulness of conduct via- necessary. I a*.
ilopti (I the resolution to aim nt sdeh a
COUffie—thin M*OS hc-ul irrrk. \'i orcn-sional
insult, froqui nt wrongs, ri |x ntetl ill
treatment, overturned nil my resolution—
I resented, squnbbli d, "oiic ■" r. dress, a;:d
made some encmii i—Tki* tc-i.i h- art »•;»/•/..
I determined in the oufsH to mind mv
own business; to-i down ami In tndustri-oinranu
steady; lomalri my shop mj IKI :
il was head work again. Pleasure all .r.
id j fashion il i/zled : mv gay noqiiaiirtnn.
eis persuaded] and I divided my lime In-ttvoen
business and amusement, devoting;
far too large a shire to the lotli r—heorl
work again I
Of all otlll r lessons in the world, 1 wish-ed
to learn tint of peonoiny, it seemed of
first importance: ol'-'mportantI I convin-ced
myself iif this—resolved and resolved
—entrenched inys. If h. lii»Vl logfe, old,
maxima, and the fatherly SjuJinnnition of
aged advisers—il was head work : sound
In ad work. But money, money : what a
world of fine tilings ii "ill buy; how many
temptations am til re to sp •ml it, how ea-sily
it slips through one's fingers! The
heart persnadi d me now out of n little, and
then out of a little, to pamper this appi lite
and indulge in that pleasure, until I became
nearly a downright extravagant fi limy. It
was all hear! work, for 1 gave my bead the
credit of argning with me nt every step a-bout
it, and of proving that 1 was doins
wrong over and over again.
Another maxim lor which I stood in-debted
to my head was—" dont get mar-ried,
till you are a good long journey up
1,;||"—| co.ined that <>\i r, and laid it under
inv pillow, determined to stick by it, come
what would ; I ehuekled at every silly go*.
lin of a beardless hoy who pill his neck in
the noose as soon as he escaped from school,
anil thought myself far wiser—but in the
midst of my triumph, a fair blue eyed
nymph eame into the neightorhood—and
—zounds! I got married in less than si*
months, and my wife usurpi d llm plan- of
inv resolution—this was heart work.
1 had a friend in therily who was master
of a good business, whoso prospects were
promising, and who ha I begun the world
With high hopes and spirits. I saw him
sending lillle poems lo the printer; they
were printed ; praised; recited by the girls;
and at last some bodj said "the author <d
these pretty verses should pill them ill
0 less perishable form"—should collect
them; make a book. It turned Dick's
bead upside down—Milton, Drvilen, Tope,
Cowper, danced before him in deathless
honors; he shut up -hop; turned author;
;m,l is—a poverty stricken poet, without a
phirlora shilling to this day. Tills was
all heart work : reason had nothing lo do
with i'-
GREKNSllOROLCII, FRIDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER 1, 1H3G. NO. 23.
The influence of the heart over the head
is also lo he seen in a thousand oilier in-stances
of conduct. The man who em-barks
in pursuit of fame, whether in litcra-lure
or polities, or in the field of war, lets
iro the helm of reason ; is governed by his
heart instead of his head. And in reli-gion,
the greatest of all concerns, it is
wonderful to observe the pOWcHjtl opera-lion
of the human beart.
Every man's head. I suppose, teaches
him illai piety is most important, most de-sirable,
lo convince Iho understanding thai
I here is a (iod ; that he is good, conse.
quently that we will be held accountable
tor our conduct. They know loo, thai it is
at least probable that he has made a reve-lation
of his will, on a conformity to which
depends all their fuliire hopes. Yet the
heart dislikes the strictness of this law,
and absolutely jnouades thousands not to
inquire after the true rule of duty; to
ph ad ignorance ; and a general disbelief
of what they have never examined—the
llihle—as if such a plea would avail them
any tiling.
Il is a pity,a (jreat pity, that reason, the
helm given io us through the voyage of
life. In our creator, should he abandoned
for the unsteady, the erring oar of passion.
Thousands have been hurled lo ruin by
their hearts, who, had ihcv trusted solely to
their heads, would have been safe. Head-er,
think of this—Is il not so I
their own fields, and slumber beneath their I world had ever had any other human i
own collage, and, perhaps, become the
founders of new eonimuiiilies of moral,
physical, and intellectual giants.
j burs, which, in consequence of ill-digested
habitants. The scattcn d hones of w bales, efforts, is only calculated to excite inllaiua-
HOW TALL WAS ADAM!
This important question has been delta-led
with as much earnestness as if the sal-vation
of the world depended upon it, by ihn i
IMny very learned men of different ages
and Countries, who, however they may
have differed in their Computation, all a-grocxl
in one thing, that the stature of our
first father was prodigious.
In the foremost rank of these speculators
we must place the Jewish Rabbin, nud the
mystical writers of the Talmud: some of
the latter assert that when Adam w.t- first
lion and painful feelings throughout! Thou
an ion ver making such unconscionable le-vies
upon thy peaceable associate, the Liv-er,
as lo slir up its bile,until all communi-cation
In twi'eii you becomes cut off, and
things can no longcrgo on smoothly. Heart-burnings
are a proof of this, noliv ithstand-bones
six feet long, no wonder liny beliov- ing the opinion of thy physician, Ri posing
d there had been enormous giants in the I in the vory bosom of plenty, with nothing
land.—These remains strongly confirmed I to do, underUeavcu, but cat, it is KKALLV
the vulgar error; for when man caii jay of inexcusable iii thee togivc somuch trouble."
rhinoccrous, hippopotami, elephants, nay
even the fossil remains of the guanodon,
the ichthyosaurus, the. mastodon, and the
inagathcrium were picked up and shown
as fractional parts of the bodies of ancient
races of men ; and when ribs were found
et in cireumfi rence, and thigh
any thing wonderful, that they have seen il I was here StopfM d by a kind of internal
with their own eyes, there is no ho|>e of thumping, followed by an almost suffocating
convincing them. The evidence or human enlargement of the (I'sophagus Hhich pro*
skeletons found ontira, of mummies, three cccdcd upwards to the pharynx, and, after
thousand years old, no ways larger, or dif- several ominous grumblings, I thus distinct-en
alcd, his head lay at one cud of the f-ring in proportion from living men and I ly heard my Stomach make reply:
world, while his Iocs touched the othel end ; women, h id no weight on these largo be- j "No more of this ranting, this rhodomnn-bul
that his figure was much shortened nf-llicvcra in the marvellous, who could swal-ltade of i hilosophv! If you are a man, lit-
Front Ihr Suhirihiy Cntiri*r.
WRONG ESTIMATE OK THL PROFES-SIONS,
We think there is one radical error in A- \
merican society, tiz: a universal disposi-tion
in underrate the macbanicai pfofos-l
■ions, when contrasted with what are term-1
ed the " lenmod professions,*' and with al-most
all the other avocations.
DIMS the rich and n speetahle machauic ;
— ihe arli/an—the archill el—he w ho rears
mi public ami private edifices—the build.
i r of our ships, and Ihe constructor of our
■•anal, ami railwavs—never permit acourse
..I' conduct in himself, which goes direct*
1} to take away from the respectability
of the profession by which he has gained
dl he possi sacs! When lie comes to lie-
(id" upon the path his sons shall pi rsui—
it is not loo often the case, that an over-weeuiuj"
disposition is displaved lo maki
lhem Uwvi rs, doctors, ministers, merebants,
any lliing but lo bring them up at ihe re-speetahle
calling of theil pirenl*
A'id I I us ask, is not Ihe same thing
Irue ofevi ry othei ela-sin theeoiiiinunil\ !
Tin sous of Atncriean citizens must In
educated for gtnllemrn. They must no;
team a trade or an arl upon which lin \
can alwavs depend for a respectable living*
I'his would lend lo lower rather than r.ii-e
them in Ihe scale of public opinion—and
hence il is, that thousands and thousands
of boys are crowded into " tin- prnfrttionn,"
and •" bthinA co!,'Httrst"—lo become, in Ihe
end geiilei I paupers, living upon the pro-duels
of Other men's labours, rather lli,in
reiving IIJHIII Iheif own hands for an hoocsf
living.
We repeal, it is ihe wrong estimate of
the competitive respectability of the differ-eiil
pursuits, that causes so dangerous an
error. We would Hot stifle genius nor de-ride
learning—IIOI do we entertain the
least disresjii el lo any profession—hut we
would have our sons laiejlil (o believe, and
made lo feel, that il is far more honorable
lo lenm some handicraft. |,v the practice of
which they can livo in independence and
honor—than to be crOWtifill into ihe always
overflowing ranks of "profession," which
will not yield their bread—and which but
too often lead 10 ihe enlire prostration of
ihe better filings of the human heart, in
low cunning, duplicity and knavery.
Who arc the props ami pillars of our
public edifice 1 Who -are " the bone and
muscle" of society 1 We, say, the median-ies
and hu-Uaudnn II of the land. 1'roui
ihe ranks of these, loo. have sprung states-men,
philosophers and sages, who liaVi
-lied imperishable lustre upon the age ii
which they lived. If the amount of r/.v-
/'<,/ intellectual attainments could bo cor-rectly
estiinnted—we entertain no douhi.
that ihe rinks of Ihe inli lligent mechanics
and agriculturists, would carry oil'ihe palm
by Immense majoriiies.
Then why should ihe almost universal
effort lo disgrace these professions, by a
simultaneous rush into other ranks, any
longer prevail! Hotter—infinitely better,
would il he that our hardy, athletic youth
should shoulder iln- axe and away beyond
III" mountains—than by a false pride and
false estimate of Hue res|>eclhbility, they
should be thrust Into wrong channels, to
disease society, and weaken the bonds of
ihe body politic.—Tlnre they might live
in the Irue pobilitv of niturc—cultivate
ter bis transgression, at ihe request of tl
angels, wlm were afraid of such a giant.
These Talniiidisls, however, left him the
height of nine hundred cubits; and others
pretend tb.it on being expelled fioni I'.ira-disc,
he walked strait through Ihe ocean,
which, so enormous, and was the length of
his limbs, even after I hey had been short-ened
bv sin, he found every way fordublc.
Olher Rabbins reject as fabulous, the ac-count
ot' Adam'sstatute equalling the length
of flic world ; they lix il otiu thousand cu-bits'
at his creation, and said that ('oil de-prived
him of exactly one hundred CUbita
when he had oaten of the forbidden fruit.
These extravagant notions prevail among
the Turks, Arabs, and many people, who
certainly never read the old Jewish writers,
toil who all agree in attributing to Ad.iin
a Inoat super human size. The stature of
Eve, his wife, was of course, proportion-ate
; and in Ihe neighborhood of Mecca,
Ihey show a hill which staved as Eve's pi!-
luv.-, and afar off, in Ihe plain, Ihe spots
while her legs rested, the distance from
one of her feet lo the other being compu-ted
at Iwo musket shots.
We should hardly have expected lo sec
these dreams revived in Franco ill ihe
eighteenth century, and among a society of
learned nun ; yet the fact is, that in the
year 171", llcnrlou presented lo the Acade-my
of Belles l/llers a chronological scale
low an antedeluvian monster for a man.
I'miH t/if Virginia Musrum.
■"COVBAOT MoxlTI."
" l.ct ih,i e who are advised, bevvnre."
Mf Stomach.—" And pray ! what is this
Ionic.'" cries Ihe startled reader. Atonic
then, let me declare, thai the present pithy
Communication is neither .Notice of Lease
nor sale : nor is my ol j ict lo trade it away,
at first cost bad as the property is. Like
most transgressors, I am willing that inv
experience should do tin- public more good
than it does myself; and, therefore, I have
ventured forthwith the following record oi
moral eXfiose—Ihe motto of which may be
—" f 'oveaiit Monitt.'
It is inv misfortune lo have been horn
with a stomach, and lo hive felt the wholl
neighbourhood thereof in a stale of insubor-dination,
for sonic time past. The gastric
functionary, which I conceive to be the
ring-leader, has, since the coining of the,
line iidminislriitiitn, actually proved out-rageously
turbulent. A quarrelsome and
perhaps heroic spirit, has best I it, or it
grumbles a great deal about Hi:i (UMI. The
hint has, hitherto, been lost upon me, lie.
cause I consider III) si If made up of separ-ate
and independent stales which u< ver
agreed alsiut the rules of general govern-ment,
and I have long been familiar with
jieltv local complaints. In short, though
of human stature, win rein he soberly in- it is as obvious as the day, that I have a
sisled that Adam was exactly one hundred Ig^^ constitution,ovcry lliing, thai happens
and twenty-three feet nine inches high. | a,,(,,. seat nf government, is made to ap-and
Eve, one hundred and eighteen feet. |M.ar altogether unconstitutional. I bad al-iiiue
inches ami three quarters; being pre-1 „„,., arrived at a state of apathy and abso-cisely
four feel ebviii inches and a quar. 1 |lltl, indifference lo every object, outside
tor, shorter than her husband. of my siudv door, wHiti ail occurrence took
According to Ilennoii'.- scale, the size of ||,|acCj which justice to my heirs at law, ami
man rapidly diminished from his lirsl fall.',, r,.L,iiri| f„r others, induce me to lav before
down to his redemption,Mill bill for the lid- t|„. public. My habits arc sedentary, am'
vent of our Saviour, (he human form di>
vine vv (inli!, in lite same process of iliininil-
I seldom go abroad; bill some vt:uv KIMi.
r.vnxc. rnti:\ns, a shorl lime since, invited
I ten lo plain sense, and learn to tU> uie more
I justice in Allure. Il is in vain lo expect
I others lo be more perfect than yourself, and
I reformation must commence with von. Tti
I, who am so utterly neglected, that slmubl
bring the charge. Actually wasting away
for want of daily exercise, and a little sha-king,
the legs refuso to walk with me I I
cannot loss over chairs, and knock o|«'ii
doors, lo enforce obedience; and the Head,
upon which I principally rely for all reason-able
support, absoluli ly does not seem to
think al all about the. When I do succeed
in calling its attention, a trilling cold or
headache is brought forward as an exeuso
for not interfering in Ihe matter. You havo
the cruelty to tell iii" thai I have nothing to
do but lo cat, eat! And is not Tins some,
lliing, when you cram, cram? Without coi:-
sol.iiion, and often without inclination, I am
Bluffed beyond bearing; and if 1 mustneeds
state a suspicion, not from kindness to my-self,
but wholly for the accommodation and
hem lit of others! Win re is the temperthat
could stand this .' < 'oinpi lied by fate, I strug.-
glC hard lo remove Ihe burdens thus iin|M>-
-i d ; bill day after day, Ihe labour still re-mains.
All the world seems to go in a! far-ilia,
and go out al I'ylorus! The Doctors,
I must say, talk a gnat deal of nonsense a-bout
gastric juice ami pancreatic juice,, but
even verjuice could not make head against
such ma.-s of matter. At one time vouliolt
down whole charges of buck-shot, and ex-peel,
forsooth, that tin se are lo be softened
by a touch! At another, you deluge mo
with floods of hot lea and collie, until there
is not a dry spot lo he seen! If I am calm,
aildol casc,w]iicli((od kuowsis verv seldom
iiidei (I, tlS ten lo one but you pour down
•our wine, or rascally toddy, to work me in-to
frenzy. For what, in Iho name of coin-moil
sense, dots Ihe world take me ! The
presumptuous chemist, 1 suppose, teaches
you that 1 am a patient, high-pressure l)i-lion,
have been reduced, long ere our time, „,,. , I'lilogislicaiilaeid-Conroclorl n a sl:r-io: and I unwittingly fell in * »,''' or " ™^«^^«-^«l0rl
to that of a mis, raid, homiiucolus, ,,,.! «.•„;„, ,,„, proposal. We feasted sumptuous. Al"> >•>''.. .V""™ H. Wlthotl wishing to bo
high as my Inch- Toby's knee. The I |y.11M| were verv agreeable at f,rst-cou. ""olvcd ill scientific speculations,think >t
i - -" &* k ■' * ' B..II ..Itlll.tfl HO ll.Vlllvt ttl'll I -llAllljl Sl',..|ll It learned author says that Nodi was twent}
feel shorter ihan Adam; that Abraham
was only twi nly-seveii feet high ; but as
for Hoses,(poor punv creature!) he measu-red
no more than thirteen feet from the
crown of his head lo the soles of his feel,
ileuriou like a Irue theorist, wedded heart
and brain lo his system, is by no means dis-couraged
or put out when In* gets among
the facts of tolerably well authenticated
history. In contempt of all authority, he
says, Alexander the tireat who was re-in
irked among his cotemporaries as being
rather a small man, wits six feel high, but
that Julius Casar only measured live feel.
Under Augustus our Saviour was bom,
versed harmoniously about choice cuts, and
drank wine like gentlemen. In good linn
we entered U|HUI warm arguim uis about
elections, slate rights, bargain, corruption,
and Otlll r sins of Ihe day. Noise ami dis-order
soon followed. We took in even
more of vvine and solids than we gave out
of words; and, when I retreated from my
post, inv comrades wt re somewhere in the
seventh Heaven. As for myself, I revolv-ed
slowly in inv orbit homeward, filled, like
Ihe primitime earth, wild inward.fire, and
groaning under ihe pressure of superincum-bent
strata, composed chiefly of calf's Ihi.'ul
soup, beef, porter, goo-eaud onions, chick-en-
pie, macaroni-pudding, custard, cream.
and thon fhe stature of mankind ceased •<• ■ t ri tit—few independent formations—snel
dwindle, and began even to shoot up a lit- , ;ls iar|S and sweel meol organic remains
lie but there Uenriou's Echcllt Chronolo-1 front both kingdoms, including fish,oysters,
uit/ur slops, he having proved to his entire |cabbage and potatoes—together w'ilheoll'(
alisf.ietion, that, ill Ihe course of threi
thousand years, man had diminished and
lost one hundred and eighteen feet nine
inches of his stature.
The Siamese, ami other Asiatick people,
have a religious belief that corresponds
with the ingenious Frenchman's hard-la-bored
scale : liny say thai since the loss of
Ins primitive innocence, man has gradually
Income less, and thai in ihe end he will
not be higher than a magpie. But all peo-ple,
all religious, all superstitions, have
reasonable, no doubt, thai I should resem-ble
a hrewer's-vat. a mash-tub, a tool-chest,
or, at least, a common corn-bag, which may
be stuffed until the stitches give way ! Pre-sumptuous
jargon ! I am out of all patience
w uli such lolly !"
I assured the nngrv organ that 1 bad a
much higher opinion of its workmanship;
but "the stt am was up," and ran on:
"What are those anli-bilious, K.XKI livm.r.
mil—thoseprovocativcs,cnticers,ami stom-achics,
but insults heaped upon abuse? It
is the fashion, 1 hear, to father II|K>II me all
Ihe offspring of that monster Dvs|K'psia,aud
of ihe sallow raceof Hepatitis. Nay, I firm-
Iv believe that I am responsible for all kinds
ofcholie, pains,and bruises. Am I rot ilm
very carryall of Hnctot's slops—flic thorough.
fare for pills, boluses, powders, tinctures,
and other items, "s per bill' No mailer how
in. .H'eut myself, I am compelled lo pitch,
lead foremost, under ihe awful operation of
an emetic; and for what I Perhapsto relievo
a lo—aehe, of w hich I never he; r ', prior lo
s hole lor what I know, and fold, so iiupi.lil.ablc an attack upon my f. clings !
and a vt ry considerable FBESII water depo.
site lo regulate the whole.- I pon entering
inv study, I look |iossession of the easy
chair, stretching my weary feel bcvoiid
Sv iiuin
ing my arms for a little philosophy, I look-il
soberly at the floor, and thuscoininiin
How shall I pacify thee ' How study ihv
whims and eccentricities? Thou an the
acknowledged'the existence, in formerI niosi tyrannical of Potentates, sacrificin
Instead of hi ing surprised at in) irregu-
I irily of temper, you should praise heaven
wilh llivself upon the high degree of disor-1 lint I still hold together. Instead of laiiiell-gani/.
afiou within.
Mysterious instrument of existence
ling Ihe injury which, youare pleased lossy,
the good nuturcd Liver, and many other
neighbours sustained through me, you should
regulate,your own taste, and not permit that
chattering, conceited vurlot, the Tongue, lo
ed to dwell upon the visionary picture of
days when we were purer in heart, strong-er
ill frame and mind, "more blest, more
wise," III.in we now are.
limes, of a gigantic race, and have delight-1 al| the world to self! If 1 wish lo leach usher into my presence all sorts of company.
thee frugality, thou art boisterous and ill
tempered ; and if I off r too freely al thv
shrine. Ihou arl killed with the kindness :
Day is devoted to Ihv service: nor is even
Until a comparatively very recent date,Inight exempt i Churl as thou arl, thou basi
the sciences of geoloirv and comparative I beset the high road of nutriment, and, like
Ianatomy were so ven littlocultivated, that the dog in the manger, will neither feed pet,_though interring, wosassui g the
all the In bones „f the largest of living thyself, m.r permit rs to In- Is .e fitted, rigid character of a curtain lecture about
creatures, and of those monstrous animals ; Nav, thou art even worse than this. Sour: ii ms, which could not be relinquished ; MI
• thai have so Ion" disappeared from file face ' and out of humor thyself, 'good things ore ' I v u Id. .1 to the influence of mv kind m, dl-of
the earth, were taken for hum: s. absolutely thrown away upon Hue 'II i lator.Sleep.and.fora time.rorgol the stings,
IPcople -•,.,..,, I,, hue forgotten tint thojearriest on an intestinal wwwiththy nrngh-^notof conscience, but of sroxicn
Instead of lecturing me for degeneracy and
want id' strength, you should abstain from
smoking hot, and high seasoned dishes,
from luscious wines, from—
Here I lost Ihe thread of our dialogue.
*deep was bearing hard upon Hie. The sub-